I know I am not the only person that has seen these idiots in the world that make you wonder what the fuck is wrong with people. But sometimes it is so amazingly dumb that you wonder how they got out of the house. Or why they’re not locked up. Many years ago, I worked in a retail store and during one of the worst blizzards, with negative temperatures and a travel ban, I would see new moms come in straight from the hospital with their newborn baby, what the fuck! Come on, you can’t be seriously thinking that this is perfectly normal to bring out your newborn baby in subzero weather in a blizzard during a travel ban! There should be nothing in the world that is that God damn important to risking your life and your baby’s life, stay home and order it online.
People do the absolute dumbest shit especially when the weather is bad, why is that? Does the brain just shut off, fall out of your head, or are you just brain-dead?! I was told a story of an elderly woman in a walker that climbed over a 3 ft. snowbank and fell just to pay her insurance bill, really?! Again, bad weather, snowstorm, hello your elderly, stay the fuck home and mail the payment in!
The southern part of the United States is hilarious because they see one snowflake and shut down the entire town. Not that the North seems to be any better when it comes to the snow, they drive like complete idiots. Makes perfect sense to ride someone’s ass when the road is icy and you couldn’t stop if you tried. Learn how to drive or get the fuck off the road. Get a four-wheel-drive vehicle if you are living in a state that has winter more than three months out of the year, stop driving a stupid little speedbump! They did make Jeeps for a reason people!
If you had to deal with of these jerks that come in high as a kite or drunk off their ass, then I feel sorry for you. Public service jobs suck, the public is nasty, mean, rude, smelly and ignorant. Is being an adult and taking care of your business so horrible that you need to get stoned prior to walking into the bank, hospital of all places, or any other office building? Guess what jackass, we smell it and your stench sticks around. Now how about those lovely people that do not know what personal hygiene is. I’ve recently encountered a young male adult that smelled like he shit himself, nasty! There is this thing called soap and water is even free in a public bathroom, clean the fuck up before you go into a professional building to conduct your business please. Nobody wants to deal with your stinky ass.
Speaking of shit, a farmer came into my place of work five years ago with cow shit on him. He didn’t get past the security guard, but the place did smell of manure until the next day when the cleaning person arrived to mop up. So, I tell a girlfriend about this and she says that he probably shit himself. I explained to her that I live in dairy country and that it was a farmer with manure on him and she asked me how I knew, I shook my head. Apparently, she thought that all shit smelled the same. I no longer speak to her. I understand that you can’t fix stupid, but you can avoid it.
This one is for you parents who are just bad role models. I am a parent to and I do realize that children have accidents, this is not about accidents, it is about teaching your kid to be inappropriate in public. Entering a place that states “no public restrooms”, so you tell your kid to piss on the floor just to be a dick. Telling your child that it is okay to shit on the floor in the clothing department is beyond disgusting, you need your head examined. Holding your child above a trashcan that is for sale in the store, so he can potty is disgusting. You are an idiot and you should not have children.
It is a great time to bring up the flu season. Use your head and stay home. Do not go out to public places when you have been diagnosed by your doctor with the flu! The flu is a virus and it is spread through the air and human contact. I am pretty sure that the doctor does tell you that but you are too stupid and too selfish to give a shit. And yes I have seen this with my own eyes, I know I’m not alone. Come on people these things are common sense, this used to exist in the world. A client of mine came and straight from the hospital right after having a hysterectomy, she was in so much pain she was doubled over and yet she came in instead of going home and resting or returning to the hospital. WTF?
Alright here’s a good one. The deli department in your local store will usually have a ticket machine where you take a ticket with a number on it and wait your turn. Pretty simple system and it is used at several other places. Typically, the numbers would be called in order. Now say there is a line of 11 people, different ages, races, and genders. The first person gets a number before the other people, and the next person calls the deli worker a racist. Do we see something wrong with this picture? It is not about race people, these employees are doing their job so stop being an asshole and making trouble where there is none. Now I’m sure there is going to be somebody who reads this and calls me racist, sure I hate the human-race, I prefer animals over people because they aren’t assholes.
I have a magnet in my office with a great saying on it. It’s at the top of the page. If you got a laugh from this, share it. If you have something to say to me, leave a comment below.